Archive for October, 2011|Monthly archive page

Damn you, Halloween.

In Uncategorized on October 25, 2011 at 1:31 am

I’ve been tossing around reasons in my head all day just to answer one silly question.

Why am I sad?

I came up with every reason I could to justify it.

You’re on your period…wait…you’re clearly not.

Maybe you’re pmsing…lame excuse.

Maybe you’re money stressed…isn’t every 20-something living in LA? Next…

I couldn’t figure out a reason to save my life. All I can say is I absolutely have not felt like myself the past week. I feel more insecure about myself both physically and emotionally than I ever have. I feel cynical. I feel bitter. I feel self-conscience. I feel angry. I feel soft-spoken. I feel like I don’t trust anyone.

This is not a pity party. I don’t like whining. Not from other people, and especially not from myself. I just genuinely wanted to know what the hell was wrong…

then I figured it out..at least I think I did…

This is my theory…

Everyone gets lonely around Thanksgiving/Christmas time. Its the time when people start evaluating where they’re at in life. Are they in a happy relationship? Do they have someone to bring home and meet the family? I never get Thanksgiving/Christmas seasonal blues. What I’m realizing is I get Halloween Seasonal Blues…BADLY.

I had the seasonal blues so badly last Halloween season that I don’t think I said more than 20 words to people at work for the duration of the month. I shut down. I love this Halloween season so damn badly and I expect too damn much from it that I just shut down.

I want someone to carve pumpkins with and watch scary movies with. I want to obsessively do every cliche activity on the typical Halloween To-Do List. I want to see my family. I want to be a little kid again. Damn you, Halloween season. I love you so much that I’m letting you tear me apart.

Blog Battle #7: When I’m old and gray…

In BLOG BATTLE on October 15, 2011 at 8:31 pm

Guess what kids…Jenny Rae and I are bringing back the BLOG BATTLE. Its time for BLOG BATTLE #7: When I’m old and gray…

Be sure to check out her blog at: http://lilraecakes.tumblr.com/post/11490968483/oldbattybroad

I was recently delirious and wrote the following status update on my personal facebook page:

When I grow up I want to be awesome.

To this day, I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I never come up with a specific answer, because coming up with a specific answer is the same as admitting that one day, I will grow up. This fact is still unfathomable to me. I have the most severe Peter Pan Complex you can ever imagine. I still giggle. I still skip. I still laugh at the sound of the fart. These are things about me that will never change. Every day I take a flying leap out my window and escape to a place where adventure is cherished, and boring people are forced to walk the plank.

Back to the status update…

I was surprised at how quickly people hit the ‘Like’ button on that one…a couple people even commented, “you already achieved that.”

Maybe I’m already awesome, but I hope to continue to be awesome.

In fact, I hope to continue to be awesome until I’m old and gray.

I often wonder what I’ll be like when I actually grow up.

Here’s how I see myself down the road…

Hopefully I’m still married to the love of my life…and if we’re not still married, I’ll at least have two cats to keep me company during the day. I’ll wear bright obnoxious colors every day as well as over-sized hats. I’ll have grandkids. Lots of them. This I know. I’ll tell them stories. I’ll make them laugh. I’ll take them to the circus. I’ll take them anywhere, just so long as they know that life is meant to be fun. I don’t imagine that I would’ve changed much by this point in my life. I don’t imagine that I’ll suddenly be bitter or cranky. I believe that I’ll still see the world through rose colored glasses. I believe that I’ll still be a supporter of silliness and falling in love. With age comes wisdom. We learn to make better decisions. We learn not to waste our time on people who will break our hearts.

Why are people so against having a broken heart? If you get your heart broken, doesn’t that mean that you had one to begin with? It means that you were human enough to feel something for someone else, and screw the world if it didn’t work out. You were brave enough to feel something. Anything. This is what I’ll teach my grandkids. I’ll tell them not to fear making mistakes. I’ll encourage them to make mistakes. Make a plethora of them. I’ll just tell them not to be afraid of the things that life may throw their way.

I’ll tell them to stop and smell the roses. Say hello to people. Smile. Enjoy your life. You only get to live it once.

And finally, I’ll tell them to tell stories. I’ll tell them to believe in make-believe. To use their imaginations…

Wendy Darling might’ve grown up, but we all know that spunky girl would’ve still leaped out her window if she had the chance…

One of my FAVORITE shows I’ve ever done…I would do it again and again and again…Peter Pan at the Lewis Family Playhouse…and yes…I was grown up wendy…AND a fierce indian dancer.

Just for fun….

The cast video that I shot/edited…

Le Morte d’chivalry

In Uncategorized on October 12, 2011 at 10:33 pm

Definition of chivalry: (According to Wikipedia)

” is a term related to the medieval (Middle Ages) institution of knighthood which has an aristocratic military origin of individual training and service to others.”

I’ve been having an on-going discussion with friends about the idea that chivalry is slowly dying. When I was a kid, one of the books on the list of required reading was, Le Morte d’Arthur. I remember the entire class going into a mass panic. The book was about 500 pages long…and it was no Harry Potter. The language was tricky. You had to truly focus…and I was the only one excited to read the damn thing. I felt like I was transported back in time. Back to a time when men fought for the honor of the woman they cared about.

In my eyes..this is the face of chivalry…

Fast forward to present day, and things are a little different. I cry on the shoulders of my girlfriends when life gets complicated. More women hold the door open for me than men. In fact, the last person to offer a jacket to me because I looked cold, was NOT a man…it was a woman. I can’t even count the number of times I start walking toward a door, and a man will see me coming behind him…and he barrels right through the door as if I wasn’t even there. Now, I don’t believe that chivalry is a one-way road. Sometimes the dudes need to be saved as well. I’ve held doors open for men more times than I care to admit. I once pulled a John Cusack move from Say Anything and cried my face off in a public place to win over the love of a dude who was trying to dump me…it still didn’t work out too well and my dignity went down the crapper, but there you go. I’m willing to step it up if need be.

I believe that 2 different things have happened to allow chivalry to die.

#1 Women have become incredibly independent.Go us. We’re able to open our own doors, and have the life of our dreams whether we’re married or not. We’ve come a long way since the days of Mad Men. Somewhere along the way, we’ve realized that we want men to hold the door open for us…even though we’ve insisted that we can take care of ourselves. We’ve allowed our new-found pride to get in the way. Let me tell you something ladies. A man opening the door for you once in awhile, will not diminish your independence. Don’t get ready to light your bra on fire quite yet. We’re not allowed to bitch about something that is missing in society when we’ve made it so clear that we’re ok. Its perfectly alright to admit that you need a man around once in awhile. Let him open the damn door. It doesn’t mean that we’re gonna make you wear a string of pearls while you vacuum.

#2  There isn’t enough exposure to chivalry for anyone to be expected to know what it is….

My brother was raised on chivalry. He was taught to open the door. To respect a woman’s opinions. To have her best interest at heart. I’ve watched my brother hold the door open for a line of 20 people racing through…men and women…not one of these people ever said a simple ‘thank you.’ We’re not raised with manners anymore. There are very few gentleman coming up in this next generation. There are very few ladies either. Growing up, my grandma would have daily etiquette lessons that my cousin and I had to endure. She always made it fun. She taught us good posture by walking around with a book on our head, and we would have place-mat competitions. Place-mat competitions consisted of eating extremely messy food, and seeing who could walk away with the cleanest place-mat. We were taught to treat people with respect, and we worshipped the church of “Do onto others as you would have them do onto you.” Everything was simple. The way it should be….

I will always be an optimist at heart, so lets say that chivalry isn’t dead…lets say that it just got redefined.

Here are some encounters I’ve had from different guys recently…proof that chivalry still exists…

**Sharing your outlet in the middle of a busy Starbucks

**Not honking at me when I’m too busy putting on mascara to realize that the traffic signal has turned to GO.

**Patching up my tires for free because you just overheard me whining on the phone to a friend that I am broke.

**Telling me I look like a model even when I have zero makeup on and you know I just had a rough day.

**Running back to me after we’ve already said our farewells just to make sure I know that you are proud of me.

**Building a bed-frame for my apartment in the middle of the night because you believe that I should not go without one.

The world is a beautiful and mysterious place. It is easy for me to say that chivalry is dead. It often feels that way. But if you take a closer look around, chivalry is still very much alive…it is simply wearing a different suit.

5 things I’ve learned from Alice…

In Uncategorized on October 12, 2011 at 2:17 am

I’ve been obsessed with Alice in Wonderland from the time I was a small child. Most kids nowadays dress up as princesses when they visit Disneyland. Not me…I was dressed up as Alice whenever I made my entrance at the Dizneeland. I spent hours on the floor of the plaza inn restaurant during the character breakfast playing with the Mad Hatter. My mom threw me tea parties. I had the Alice dolls. The books. The teacups. I was obsessed.

What I’ve come to realize, is Alice always gets accidentally paired in with the Disney Princesses…

Which doesn’t make any sense…because she’s not a princess. If she were a princess, she’d have a love interest…that’s just how it works. I’ve spent most of my adulthood being single, and I looked up to the one disney character that was well…single. Maybe it was fate. Maybe the daydreamers are supposed to wander aimlessly by themselves for awhile. These are the 5 things I’ve learned from Alice…

1) It’s socially acceptable to talk to cats.

2) Change it up. Move seats. Every 2 seconds. Its ok. You only live once.

3) Fall down a rabbit hole once in awhile. Fall down period. The more mistakes you make, the more opportunities you have to learn.

4) Day dream.

5) It’s ok to be a little mad sometimes.

I had to throw in this video for fun…i was OBSESSED with this show…

Lost Boy Syndrome.

In Uncategorized on October 4, 2011 at 8:13 pm

We’ve all heard of the Peter Pan Complex.

You know…the fear of growing up and settling down. The cause of every fire-red mustang purchased by men over the age of 50. The reason why guys consistently turn down great women because they’re terrified of commitment.

Here’s the new Neverland affiliated disease that I’m going to pitch: Lost Boy Syndrome.

Every ‘lost boy’ is still trying to figure out their path in life…and that’s fine by me…because my path tends to go ten different directions, so I can relate to this. The lost boy still wants to have fun. The lost boy still wants multiple lost girls in his life. The lost boy wants to lose his marbles and fly free at the local bar…not having to answer to anyone.

Here’s the thing…it is important to understand that lost boys aren’t lost. They’re well aware of their actions, and they may even be aware of the consequences of their actions. A lost boy is aware of the consequences, but would never look at it as an actual consequence. A lost boy wants to channel their freedom while they still can. Hell, they managed to escape the pram when they were a baby to fight for their freedom, so why the heck would they let a girl take that away from them?

Here’s the catch. The one thing that a lost boy will overlook.

They all need a ‘Wendy’ in their life.

Don’t confuse a ‘wendy’ with a wife. A ‘wendy’ is a non-permanent fixture in a lost boy’s life. She is simply there to entertain him. To make him feel loved. To share in his adventures. To tuck him in at night. A ‘Wendy’ can be replaced. A ‘wendy’ is not promised a future. It is also important to understand that a ‘wendy’ is very much aware of her status. She is ok with it. She is ok with it, because deep down, every ‘wendy’ type is also a lost boy at heart. Every Wendy sits by her window at night dreaming of adventure. Yes, at times she dreams of something a little more permanent like marriage and children, but a ‘wendy’ still wants to be swept out her window in the middle of the night. She still wants to dress like a pirate. She still wants to tell stories. She still isn’t quite ready to grow up. Not just yet. There will come a time when a ‘wendy’ has gone through enough lost boys in her life and she realizes that she needs a new adventure. Her new adventure will be to grow up…but not in the way you might think. She’ll still dress up as a pirate. She’ll still be a dreamer. She’ll still believe in Neverland. The only difference is, she will no longer be a little lost boy at heart. She will have a newfound faith in her new dreams, and she won’t be afraid to pursue them. She will fly back to the nursery, pack her bags and move on.

I know all of this, because I’m a Wendy…who is also a little lost boy at heart. Cherish every adventure. Make every mistake. Live your life to the fullest.

Fairy Tales are trendy…

In Uncategorized on October 3, 2011 at 11:56 pm

I sit in my apartment blasting the flying theme from Peter Pan.….

Both the animated and the live-action version.

I also blast the flying themes from Hook.

I watch Snow White when I need a nostalgic cry. I watch Beauty and the Beast when I want to sing and cry. I watch Aladdin when I want to sing, dance and cry. My first job was at Disneyland because I figured if I was going to have to have a job, then I might as well have one in the land of make-believe. I get disturbed when I see little girls skipping around in princess costumes…only because I wish that those damn dresses still fit me. I believe in happily ever after. I believe in once upon a time.

Hell, I even believe in The End.

I believe in knights in shining armor…especially the ones who share their outlets at Starbucks or the ones who take two seconds to ask you something more clever than, “So tell me about your life.” The guys who can laugh it off when you make fun of them, and the guys who aren’t intimidated by your strengths.

All of these things that I want. All of these things that I adore. This is what makes me…me…unique…a victim of Fairy Tales…The things that make me a nerd…

Now, the fairy tales have gotten a face lift. The princesses are stunning. The princes wear costumes that actually look legit. Fairy tales…dare I say…are getting trendy. There are a number of Fairy Tale themed productions coming out…

The Untitled Snow White, Snow White and the Huntsman, and Neverland (tv series), Once Upon a Time (TV series). I can’t lie. I’m excited for all of them. My only fear is that fairy tales are suddenly going to be a fad. What about all of the pathetic souls like myself who are unique only because we have eaten up these stories for the past 20-something years of our existence? Are we suddenly cool? Are we going to suddenly fit in? The one thing that I’m grateful for, is that “Princes Don’t Live in Cyberland” is now within the realm of trendy. It seems the show has touched on a topic that is about to explode in the media world…so I guess..what I’m trying to say…is I’m ok with that…

Halloween lovin’

In Uncategorized on October 1, 2011 at 9:22 pm

There’s something about Halloween season that absolutely sparks something inside of me. Its that moment when you’re walking up to your apartment and the air feels differently for the first time all season. Its the time when the trees look differently and the skies darken a little earlier. That is the time of year when my love-o-meter skyrockets. I always feel lovey dovey around this time of year.

Which makes no sense.

I don’t know how to explain it. Valentine’s Day makes me question myself and overanalyze myself until I unconvincingly yell, “I don’t care that I’m single. I’m independent. I’m awesome. I’m….where’s the wine?”

There is something honorable about this time of year. A time of year where love is the furthest thing from people’s minds that makes me want it even more. I’ll see a carved pumpkin and instantly want to snuggle up with someone on a couch and watch Hocus Pocus or other forms of awesomeness. Yes, I’m making it official guys…this is the season to fall in love. This is the time to be crazy. I want to be chased by zombies and bitten by vampires. I want to stay out late under a full moon. I want to risk everything and run free. After all, some romances were destined to happen around this time of year…

Defective Geeks Article

In Princes Don't Live in Cyberland on October 1, 2011 at 1:15 am

Check out an adorable article written by Defective Geeks on “Princes Don’t Live in Cyberland”: http://www.defectivegeeks.com/2011/09/29/princes-dont-live-in-cyberland/

Princes Don’t Live in Cyberland Previews

In Princes Don't Live in Cyberland, Uncategorized on October 1, 2011 at 1:10 am

Hey everyone! Just a quick update regarding PDLIC. We got through previews at the ComedySportz Theatre as well as Actor’s Circle Theatre. Special thanks to my amazing family who have been my emotional support through the journey. Not to mention the fact that they handled everything from the box office/reception/my sanity. I love you SO much and this wouldn’t have happened without you.

Just wanted to take the time to breathe and thank a few people for everything that they’ve done. For the first time out the gates, I’ve been extremely lucky to have such a talented cast/crew behind me. Thank you Beth Bryson (Mom), Cat Day (Gramma), Casey Kimble (Lighting Designer), Jimmy Donahue (Light/Sound Tech) for EVERYTHING! Rehearsals and shows went so smoothly thanks to all of you! Thank you Jenny Rae for your AMAZING cake balls, and for being adorable at the post-parties. Thank you Hep Kittens for a nostalgic and beautiful night of music and vocal talent. Thank you Jordan Rushing, Ally Heller, Dan Flood and Guy Windsor for being my entertainment and crew for the post-parties. Thank you Peter Weidman and Luis Cortes for being my venue people and for helping me find 2 good homes to preview PDLIC. 


I’m in the process of venue hunting and finding a new home for a RUN of “Princes.” If you know of an inexpensive venue, hook a girl up…This is NOT the end of the show, so if you missed it, don’t worry…we’ll be back…

For now, become a fan on at www.facebook.com/OnceUponaReality

and visit the website at: www.onceuponareality.com

Twitter: www.twitter.com/ThatPrinceShow